Remembrance

Dad...so many images come to mind
whenever I speak your name;
It seems without you in my life
things will never be the same.
Some days I hear your voice
and turn to see your face;
Yet in my turning it seems
the sound has been erased.
Who will I turn to for answers
when life does not make sense?
Who will be there to hold me close
when the pieces just don't fit?
Please always know I love you so much
and no one will ever take your place;
Years may come and years may go
but your memory will never be erased.
Today, Jesus, if You are listening
in your home above;
Would you go and find my dad
and give him all my love.

Author unknown.

A New Year. The time to reflect on the past and look to the future. Much as we want to close the door on 2010 as it has been an absolutely horrific year of gargantuan proportions, by doing so it almost feels like we are shutting away the memories of the loved ones we have lost.

To some extent I wish I could shut away those memories, as they still hurt so, so much. Six months on, I still struggle to accept that I will not see my dad again. I have always been a fighter, someone who will find a way to achieve something, no matter how hard, whether or not people tell me it can't be done.

To have to accept that something is inevitable is difficult on a good day. When it's something that has such a high emotional value like the loss of a loved one, the pain just tears at your heart like shards of glass.

New Years resolutions:

To look forward and celebrate each new day.
To try and let go of the little things (this does not mean to stop analysing!)
To learn to cherish the memories of my dad and hopefully let go of some of the pain.
To make my dad proud.


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